Evanston man terrified new DMK menu won’t include sweet potato fries

EVANSTON, Ill.—When his favorite local eatery shuttered its doors this past June, Evanstonian Carson Santer was forced to question his very existence.

“Everything seemed so perfect,” said Carson. “One day, my wife and I are talking about how we’ll never leave Evanston so long as DMK is here. The very next, they closed up shop. And the day after that, we started looking for apartments in L.A.”

Carson and his wife, Helena, had been weekly regulars of DMK Burger & Fish, where they ordered pretty much the same meal every Wednesday.

“My wife stuck with the turkey burger, and I switched up my sandwich every week. But there was one constant in both of our meals: the sweet potato fries,” said Carson. “They were pretty much the best part of our work week.”

Soon after closing, DMK announced that this goodbye wasn’t for good. In fact, they plan to re-open in the fall under a new format.

“That news brought us some relief, and we decided to hold off on moving to L.A.,” said Carson. “But then reality hit.”

“All I said was, ‘What if the menu is different? What if they don’t have sweet potato fries at the new restaurant?’” said Helena. “Carson flipped out. He’s been inconsolable.”

“They just gotta keep them on the menu,” said Carson. “They just gotta.”

Carson has been undergoing counseling these past three months, and has even tried sweet potato fries at other restaurants at his therapist’s suggestion.

“Nothing even comes close,” cried Carson. “Nothing.”

Fall is fast approaching, and though Carson is holding out hope that sweet potato fries will be on the new menu, he remains skeptical.

“What if they keep them on the menu, but they change the recipe? What if they use a new fryer, or different oil? One little change, and the whole universe of deliciousness will crumble around us,” said Carson.

“Sure, he’s a little melodramatic,” said Helena. “But a part of me shares his concerns.”

The couple noted that they’ll wait until the restaurant re-opens, date TBD, before they determine whether or not a move to L.A. is warranted.

When approached for comment, DMK didn't specify exactly when their Evanston location would re-open, though owners Michael Kornick and David Morton did comment that they "hope to meet [Carson and Helena] at our new venue in the fall." 

But this update, despite affirming a fall opening, seemed to upset the Santers duo.

"You asked them whether or not sweet potato fries would be on the menu, right?" asked Carson. "And they didn't address that question directly? What does that even mean? And why did they call it a 'venue' and not a 'location' or 'restaurant'?"

Carson attempted to articulate additional concerns, but was unintelligible through the tears and sputtering.